The way I see it

 Last night, I went for the tabla concert, "Zakir Hussain and the Masters of Percussion" here in Scottsdale Center of Performing Arts. It was a beautiful evening and there were moments where I was completely mesmerized by their musical creation. It was surreal when all the 5 musicians created something in symphony. There were 3 from India, 1 from Africa and 1 from I don't know where. Everyone except one, who was a sarangi player, were percussionists.  I went alone this time, because it was a part of my Artists Date (Julia Cameron's Artist tool). Everyone around me had come with someone, either friends or family, at least as far as I could see and tell. I was wondering if I felt lonely there, looking at everyone talking and enjoying together as small groups. A musical concert is a communication between the listener and the performers, where is the place of anybody else in this relationship? There was no moment to feel lonely, I was sharing the experience generated by t...

 Writing here, at my blog, after a long time! A lot has changed for me. Every few years my influences change, the books I read change, the ideals I follow change and I change in response to that. While at it, one thing that stayed constant all these years was my employment at a software company. I have worked at Fender Musical Instruments Corp. for 13. 6 years and I decided to quit my lucrative, much respected and most of the times fun job in October 2022! It was a shock to me and almost everyone who knows me. Even though I have tried to quit my job several times over the 13.6 years that I worked at Fender, this actually was the most genuine feeling that I have acted on.  It all began with the beginning of the pandemic. I joined a book club in April 2020, right at the beginning of the pandemic. It was to study Starhawk's "Spiral Dance" with a bunch of people I didn't really know but met on FaceBook. I had already read this book before but I read it again with these am...

 I was in my favorite place on a beach in CA. It was the Pescadero beach I visited this summer. It was cold and windy and a little cloudy. The seagulls were flying and shouting with joy as the wind was blowing below their wings and through their feathers. It seemed like they were enjoying it as much as I was! My feet were naked and I had a desire to be naked as well, just a gentle cloth covering my body to protect me from the cold. I was alone. The ocean was ferocious, creating mighty waves from within itself. There were mightier ships sailing on the horizon, brave hearts they were! I had collected so many sea shells. The sand below my feet felt so soft and cold. I stood at the shore, letting some waves crash on my naked feet. It felt cold and amazing as the sand beneath my feet got dragged in the ocean by the water. I cannot express how beautiful I felt.! Just then a voice whispered in my ears, "What do you want, dear Pallavi? In this sacred place, you shall get what you want!...

There is a road always beckoning. When you see the two sides of it closing together at that far horizon and deep in the foundations of your own heart at exactly the same time, that's how you know its where you have to go. That's how you know it's the road you have to follow. That's how you know. It's just beyond yourself, it's where you need to be. --David Whyte

This is not an original post. It was written by an acquaintance (Jane Phoenix) and I found it so relevant to my current situation that I could not NOT save the post. I have been feeling a bit sad and lonely lately because one of my closest friends (SS) will be leaving Phoenix in a few months. This is not the first time that I will be saying goodbye to a close friend. Infact this will be the fourth time in the past 5 years that I have to let go of a friend because they moved away from my city. When I read Jane's words I could not believe how true they were and how letting go with this attitude made complete sense. People come into our lives for a reason. Sometimes it’s a brief interaction - a few words exchanged, maybe just a smile or a simple act of kindness. Sometimes it’s longer - a few days, a few months, a few years, maybe even a lifetime. But however long it is, they’re there for a reason - for you to learn from them, for them to learn from you, or for both of you to...

I just finished watching an episode on the show - "The Good Place" which talks about determinism and free will. The episode triggered so many thoughts in me about what I had understood about these concepts from the Bhagawad Gita. The Hindu philosophy talks about "Karma" - cause and effect in human life. Every action has a cause and it will eventually have its effect in an endless cycle of "Samsara" - birth and death. Everything you are doing and going through is a result of your past karma and your present actions determine your future. When I read it for the first time its easy to think that you are trapped and everything in life is pre-determined by your past karma, the circumstances you are born in, your environment, your genetics and that's the entirety of your existence. Where is the place for free will? Does it not exist? In the show I was talking about earlier, the main character Eleanor is wondering about the same thing and another character ...

If there is no joy when the lights come up and no sorrow when the lights are taken down, am I equanimous or things just don't move me anymore? Just wondering... New year 2020 is here. I have been asked multiple times by my friends what my resolutions for this year are. I really could not answer the question. The regular good habits that most of us want to manifest like healthy eating, physical activity, etc. are a part of my everyday resolution, its another thing that I fail them many a times! But what is it that I want to manifest this year? What is more for me to do in this world than do what I do everyday? I don't know yet. Lots of ideas, many a inspirations in mind but nothing concrete yet. May be that is my resolution for this year, to get a clarity on what is it that I want to do other than my work and my family duties. 2020 is the beginning of a new decade, the year I enter my 5th decade on Mother Earth. My 4th decade was about figuring out what is happiness, starti...